Teaching an Old Dog New Tricks: The Squeeze Technique with a Partner
Remember some men have success with it initially, but some
of the gains can be lost. This is not unusual in the world of sex. Seasoned sex
therapists often schedule follow-up appointments for any kind of problem every
six months to a year after successful treatment. That’s because sexual problems
have the tenacity of the cockroach. There can also be a placebo effect with any
kind of sexual intervention, which means it works at the start because you
believe it will. So don’t be surprised if you need to do squeeze technique
refreshers every couple of months. But this should be fun. Seriously, what’s
not to like about a partner stroking your penis?
Warning #1: Get a Grip—Stop Apologizing
Some of the most annoying aspects of premature ejaculation
that women report are the constant apologies and self-criticism that men
express after coming too soon. This whining and bellyaching puts their partners
off.
If you decide to work on these exercises together, the man
needs to promise that he will no longer apologize or berate himself for coming
too soon.
Warning #2: Feel Your Sexual Excitement
Whatever the cause(s) for coming too soon, men with PE often
try to slow it down by thinking about something unsexy, which is about as
productive as a race-car driver thinking about golf to help with his anxiety
when he’s entering a high-speed turn. All of us are occasionally distracted
when having sex, but to intentionally think about something besides sex is not
a good way to last longer. It could lead to erection problems, so you’ll then
have ED and will still come too soon. Let yourself feel totally turned on.
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Squeeze-Technique
Particulars
You both get naked and kiss and fool around. Then you kiss
and fool around some more. At some point, which is totally up to the two of
you, the female partner wags her finger in the male’s face and says sternly,
“On your back, dude!” Then she starts stroking his penis handjob style. While
it’s usually done without lube, there’s nothing that says lube can’t be used.
See what works best for the two of you and happily abuse the penis with it.
The man’s job is to tell his partner what he’s feeling in
his penis. As soon as he feels like he is reaching the point of no return, he
asks her to stop stroking and that’s her cue to start squeezing—right below the
head for 10 to 20 seconds. Then, after a minute or so, the man’s urge to paint
the ceiling should subside, and she can start stroking his penis again. Repeat
three or four times or more if you like. When the two of you decide that Mr.
Winky has had a good enough workout, she can stroke him until he blows.
After a few weeks of doing it this way, the woman might
experiment with switching techniques. Rather than stopping and squeezing when
he tells her he’s about to come, she might try rubbing the head of his penis
instead. So she goes from choking his chicken to polishing his helmet.
As for erections, don’t worry about them. What you are
interested in is trying to tolerate more sensation.
A variation on the squeeze technique is called the
stop-start technique.
Instead of squeezing when the man is close to coming, his
partner removes her hand from his penis. It’s totally your call as to which
technique you’d prefer to use.
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From Squeezing to Intercourse:
When the two of you feel you are getting more control over
the situation, the woman might try stimulating the penis with her lips instead
of her fingers, or by sitting on top of the man and rubbing his penis with her
vulva. This is called femoral intercourse. It is where the shaft of the penis
glides through the lips of the vulva like a hot dog in a bun. The penis doesn’t
go into the vagina, but glides through the vulva’s lips. The woman can lift her
pelvis up when her partner is close to coming.
After another week or two, she might try putting the man’s
penis inside of her vagina while she is on top. It’s good to keep it there for
several minutes without thrusting too much. This helps the man get used to the
warmth and other sensations, and there’s nothing that says she can’t be playing
with her clitoris while his penis is inside her vagina. Keep experimenting.
Read Ultimate Sexual Stamina Program | The Blueprint to Mastering Male Ejaculation Control
The Point of No Return
When doing the squeeze technique, it is helpful to recognize
when a man is approaching the Point of No Return. This is when nothing short of
stepping on a land mine will keep him from ejaculating.
Signs that ejaculation is eminent include: the veins in his
penis start to bulge, his love log gives a sudden throb, the color of the head
darkens, his testicles suck up into his groin, his muscles start to tighten,
his hips thrust, and he starts to groan like a dying bull or invokes the name
of God or Allah.
Appreciate how well you are doing if you can keep him close
to the point of no return for several minutes without letting him go over the
edge.
Also, it helps if the couple can cut themselves plenty of
slack. There will be times when a guy reaches the point of no return before his
partner can squeeze or pause. It’s no big deal. It’s not like this is the first
time he’s ever ejaculated with a hand around his penis. Doing the squeeze
technique should be fun, and occasionally funny. It’s not a reality-show
competition.
Luckily below (in guide number 17) you’ll find an encyclopedia of techniques guys can use to last longer in bed.
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